Wrong Ron Gets interrupted 04Jun2010
Added 04 June 2010
Psycho Anna Liszt: Ron, where have you been? You’ve missed the last few appointments?
Wrong Ron: Hi, Psycho Anna; I just wanted to wait until the Tigers won a game
PAL: I may have been waiting for years! But congratulations to you on the win
WR: Nothing to do with me, but what a great win
PAL: Good, now let’s get right down to business
WR: Well, this is what I… {door bursts open and in comes an unknown man who looks distressed}
Receptionist: Sorry, I tried to stop him but…
PAL: Whoever you are… get out!
WR: No, wait. He looks like he needs more help than me; I’ll wait
PAL: Who are you, then?
Man: I am Longggey and I have a big problem!
WR: I’ll leave
Longggey: No, stay. Perhaps you can assist
PAL: What seems to be the problem
Longggey: I am running this footy analysis website and for three weeks now I have tipped certs that lost. Last week two of my certs lost
PAL: Give me an idea of the size of the problem
Longggey: I am supposed to be helping people by giving them clues to avoid footy tipping errors; but I am making too many
PAL: Are there any positives?
Longggey: Well, my normal tipping is going just okay and my weighted tipping is pretty good
PAL: All right then; so we don’t have all blue skies then, as the global warming people say
Longggey: What should I do other than offer an apology
PAL: How good is your analysis?
Longggey: I think it’s excellent overall, but I reckon I have been too ambitious with some certs. I also note that the Bombers have featured in three of my four incorrect certs for the year
PAL: Now we are getting somewhere
Longggey: So maybe I will be careful about the Bombers games because of their wild fluctuations in form
PAL: Fine; now how do you feel
Longggey: Like I can face the world again
PAL: Go out there and do it. Stick to your analysis and push through this little mid season slump you are in
Longggey: Thanks; I’ll pay at the counter. See you!
WR: Can Longggey stay? He is a footy guy who may be able to assist; and then write about me
PAL: Fine by me; but let me know if you begin to feel uncomfortable
WR: Anyway, it goes back to 1982/83 time frame when I decided to barrack for the Tigers, having weighed up between them, the Blues and the Hawks. I went for the Tigers and they began 1983 on a big losing sequence. I got into a fight with a big kid from school. He blamed me for the Tigers losing; said that they were flying until I became a supporter. Because of the fighting, mum had to pick me up from school a couple of days and she had a bad car accident on the way to school one day. Dad was really furious and blamed me for the whole thing. I was only six years old
PAL: Tell us how you felt?
WR: I felt like a bad person. I wasn’t able to process it well. I believed my dad when he said my mum’s car accident was my fault. And I felt worse every time the Tigers lost
PAL: Go back to those times and feel the emotion
WR: It’s so painful
PAL: What do you feel?
WR: It’s all my fault! Mum’s accident; she had her arm in a sling for weeks. Richmond’s losing streak which has gone on more or less for 27 years
PAL: Okay, now listen to me
WR: Huh.
PAL: You were only a little boy. Your mother was driving the car and you weren’t in the car to distract her, right?
WR: Yes.
PAL: And what if today a six year old boy told you that he was responsible for a car accident his mother had while he was not in the car?
WR: That’s totally ridiculous; I’d tell him he was innocent
PAL: Exactly; now go back and feel the emotion surrounding your mum’s car accident and tell me what happens
WR: Right; I’m there in my mind. Oh, it’s all my fault
PAL: Now come back
WR: Yes
PAL: Why was it your fault?
WR: I just can’t remove it from my emotions
PAL: Now go back to the kid at school who blamed you for Richmond losing and feel the emotion once more
WR: Yes, I am there. Same thing! It’s all my fault, too. Every Richmond loss
PAL: Now come back to the present and evaluate it logically
WR: Why do I feel guilty for all this? But I feel totally to blame whenever Richmond loses!
PAL: So here is a principle to learn. Whenever your emotional response to a current situation is way over the top or totally inappropriate, it is likely to refer back to a childhood or family issue that is not resolved. And until it is resolved, you will find yourself believing the lies from back then and, in a sense, you will be trapped. That’s why you feel so bad about Richmond. The last three decades of Richmond Football Club history is just a coincidence.
WR: All right; so I, as a child, believed some lies. So now I am trapped. And that leads to this sort of depression I have.
PAL: Correct!
WR: Lies; trapped; depression
PAL: That’s the order
WR: Or, in other words: Falsehood, Prison, Blues
PAL: Yes
WR: Hmmmm (counting his CASH)
Falsehood, Prison, Blues
I feel another song coming on:
While Freo showed they’re comin’
And Melbourne’s on the mend
Us Tigers finally won a game just last weekend
We’re stuck down on the bottom, and time keeps draggin’ on
There is light way down that tunnel – although the tunnel’s long
Back in the early eighties I was told by my mum
The Tigers won’t be any good til next millennium
And I see small signs of progress, but I can’t deny
That for nearly thirty years now, all I’ve done is cry
I hope that new coach Hardwick is going to be the man
So long he drafts well and doesn’t give us five year plans
And until I kick those lies out, I know I can’t be free
But I’m not sure I can do it, and that’s what bothers me…
I have felt like I’m in prison, when we’re losing all the time
But if I take Anna’s advice my mental state will climb
Far from wooden spooner, that’s where I want to stay
And the next time we play Carlton, I’ll blow those Blues away
PAL: Now you see how to solve the problem; you just need to be able to convince yourself deep down that Richmond losing is not your fault
WR: Right! I have the idea and I’ll work on it
PAL: Good
WR: But it’s all my fault! There I go again!
PAL: Work on it and report back. I’ll see you soon
Longggey: All the best, Wrong Ron, for your recovery. And thanks for letting me barge in. By the way, the Saints are certs to beat the Tigers tonight
PAL: But win, lose or draw, Wrong Ron, you know what you need to do
WR: Correct. Goodbye, Psycho Anna and Longggey